The Decisions that Define

As I grow older I find myself thinking more of the past than the future. I think this is normal for humans, especially older ones, because one's individual history is what has molded that person into what he is or thinks he is today. The future, on the other hand, is yet to be a direct influence on us and is not certain or yet defined. I think it is also true that we can look at the past as a series of successes and failures, good and bad decisions and successful or failed relationships. The accumulation of these positives and negatives in our past have a great impact on how we and others preserve and associate with us.

Young people do not usually have a great deal of history (baggage) to define them and therefore are  less concerned with the past than the future. They are for the most part likely to make quick and oft times unsound decisions. They have not yet learned that for every decision there are consequences. They may be good or bad but like in physics, for every action there is a reaction (though not necessarily an equal or opposite reaction).

Looking back on my life I realize that my accomplishments and failures were for the most part due to decisions I made. Not all of course. Some were the results of circumstances beyond my control.

I once read an article that stated that for the average person the life defining decisions or actions that define his life can be counted on one or possibly two hands. Think about that for a moment and look at who and where you are. I did a little list of my own defining decisions/actions and came up with the following:
          
                               Graduated from College
                               Joined Army
                               Married
                               Served in Vietnam
                               Children
                               Reduction in Force / Left Active Duty                 
                               Joined Army Reserves
                               Hired by Federal Government
                               Worked in Israel
                               Retired  

There is a lot of activity, decisions and circumstances associated with and in between these listed items but these are the ones that had a life changing influence that defines who I am today.

I know some people that dwell on or define their life by one or two circumstances in their life. Those that served in a war zone (especially if they were directly involved in life and death combat action) are prone to disregard other points in their life and define themselves solely by those one or two (maybe more) years. One or two seem to think they peaked in High School. Everyone has more than one life defining decision or circumstance even though one may overshadow all others.

I guess the points I am trying to make are 1) that it is OK and even healthy for older folks to think often about the past but not to get caught up in dwelling on one aspect or time of that past and 2) It is OK and even good for younger people to focus on the future as long as they think about their decisions and the possible consequences thereof.

Think about your own life. What decisions or circumstances caused you to be "YOU"?